Monday, November 24, 2008

obsession.

Mini SKIRTS, shorts, Over the Knee socks, Tights, and BOOTS!
That's all I care to wear these days. I have a problem. But, I'm kind of loving it.
I'll probably over do it, because I have the tendency to get excited and go with something and not know when to stop. But fuck it.
I'm loving getting dressed these days. I spent a good few hours fashion-showing it up in my bedroom last night planning out future outfits. And I'm pretty much set for a while. I have outfits planned for dayyyyys.
Yayyyy Fall!

Some Favorite looks (These were not created by me), from my favorite website:

"My fantasy has turned to madness, All my goodness has turned to badness."

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Nothing beats a good distraction.

Shit's going down at work, literally. In the sense that soon there will be no more work. boo. So, that's wearing on me. However, never under estimate the power of a good distraction. I'm in a super good mood today. I hope it will only get better.... hmmmm


Hope is everyone is fantastic. Or is able to go out and find a cute guy or new outfit to defer your bad thoughts for a bit. Always works for me!

Friday, November 14, 2008

Could it be that everything goes round by chance.

I fully intend to just the shit out of my bike allllll weekend. I haven't been doing nearly enough physical activity since Softball ended and I'm starting to NOTICE it! boo. It could just be PMS. But, that's usually my answer to all my complaints :) Don't judge me, it's totally fair.

Being at work right now is weird, and borders full on sucking, at some times :/
Today is actually a bit better despite one thing I'm really sad about.
A lot of faces that I loved seeing everyday are gone and I miss them, and I know it won't be long until all the rest of those face are gone too, along with mine! Ever since Softball, we've totally created this little family, that I LOVE. I just hope it lasts despite the fact that we will no longer be together 40 hours a week. These are some of the best people around.
Other than that, the actual work part is mostly easy for me right now... however, It's really just depressing to be killing something we've all worked so hard on while we've been working here, some longer than others. I do have hope that the company will be able to bounce back form this and do something with the products they do have. Then it might not feel like a total waste, even if I don't profit from it.
I've been so proud of what I did here and to be working for this company and had the opportunities I had. I know that I was good at my job, sometimes excellent, sorry to brag. But this was a perfect place for me. I've been lucky enough to have had some great leaders as well as coworkers.
I had lunch with an old boss yesterday, who I LOVED, who has agreed to be a reference for me. It was so nice to get see and talk to her again since her leaving was very abrupt and I never had the chance to even say goodbye. She was always very motivating, and talking to her yesterday helped me put some things into perspective. She told me how proud she was of me and how much she's seen me grow while I've been working at IMMI. Which made me feel really great. Because I see it too, so it's nice to know someone else has noticed. I've grown a tremendous amount in many different ways since working here. I've learned things and DONE things. I am more confident in myself, and more aware of what I am capable of achieving.
With that being said. My plan is to see how possible it will be to get my ass back into school for a short period of time, BUT long enough to get myself a degree or certification. So, wish me luck on deciding what the actual goal is and area of study will be, as I have few things still to sort out.



Oh, and P.S. Tonight was supposed to be the night I flew to New York for my Vacation!!! as if I'm not a bummer enough as it is. I still have my stacks of a few outfits I had picked out folded on the floor in my room ready to pack. HA! It's really sad. I had fun outfits all planned out, and I bought a new fucking coat. I canceled my flight Friday night after talking to Jeremy about what had happened. If I took the trip still, I would not have gotten to stay and work and get paid that extra money that now, that I am potentially jobless, I will need. It's just sad. I was excited to get out of here for a bit. I haven't gone away at all this year yet. I was excited to see Jeremy again, because it's a very rare occurrence at this point.


Alright enough of my bologna!
I hope everyone else is excellent. SUNSHINE PUPPIES and RAINBOWS!

Sunday, November 9, 2008

lost it.

Well, the past 2 days have been nothing short of interesting and potentially life changing depending on how I bounce back from it. I went to work Friday Morning prepared to hear some bad news, but I never expected the Bomb that dropped. The CEO informed the entire company during a staff meeting, that a good chunk of broadcasters had backed out of deals we had lined up, and that one huge company we've been doing business with for over a year now completely dropped out and ended the partnership we had with them. Basically no one can afford to use us right now, money in advertising is at an extreme low. After explaining that, he went on to say that the company planned to make some pretty drastic cut backs immediately, and that the amount of people employed with the company would go from 70+ people to only 20. He dismissed everyone from work for the day. He apologized and sent us off to meet with our department heads.

My group met with our bosses, and our department manager pulled out a piece of paper with what she wrote down to say because she was so nervous. You could tell she was genuinely scared. She told us that our ENTIRE department was being eliminated, and all 6 panels were completely being shut down. After that she met with everyone individually. They laid off almost 1/2 my department on Friday afternoon, they had checks and everything. There are 2 more groups left. I am on the last wave, and staying until December 8th. I felt like I was in an episode of the Twilight Zone, the receptionist had started putting boxes together for people to collect their belongings. It was insanity. I've never seen anything like it. Coworkers were going around with notepads to get numbers and emails in hopes that this is not the last we'll see of everyone, there were tears and most of them were from me. I LOVE my job. For so many reasons. I'm literally heart broken right now. I've lost one the most important things in my life. And, there's not a thing I or anyone I work with could have done about it. This was an actual direct affect of how bad the economy is.

So, today I applied for about 15 various jobs. And I'm terrified. I hate interviewing. I get so tense and nervous in normal everyday situations, interviews are just bad news for me. So, boo. But, I'm trying to remain positive. Fortunately I have family and friends here for me when things go down and I need some guidance. I came and shacked up with Scott and Emily last night since Sarah went to LA for the weekend and I didn't feel like being alone the whole weekend. And it's just a good excuse to get to hang out and have some good ol' Brandt Family fun, because it is the best kind of fun!

And now a bit of a tribute to my time spent with IMMI. Thank you to these AMAZING people and so many more for being you. I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to have worked with each and every one of you: