Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Hooray for Brandt's

So, our dinner gathering tonight was great.
It was awkward I suppose at times, just because we were meeting close family for the first time, that ave lived about 7 miles away my whole life! But everyone was soooo inviting and friendly, and FAMILY!!! I'm grateful to my Aunt Linda for putting this together with my Dad.
I talked the longest to my Aunt Linda, who at one point told me how much like I act like my Mom did in her early 30's. I don't always see it in myself. I see the things I know of her in my Sister a LOT. But I guess it could be because I didn't know my mother at that age, obviously. So, that was really special to hear. My Mom must have been wayyyy cool in her 30's! hahahahaha.
I loved every minute. I actually almost didn't want to leave!
Before we left, one of my cousins wives, got a sheet of paper out and passed it around for everyone to put their email addresses and phone numbers on and then made copies for everyone.
Easily, the BEST Christmas present I will get this year.

I'm happy tonight.

I LOVE my family. Family I've known all my life, and family I met just few short hours ago. It's good to be a Brandt.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

I'm ready.

So, I'm sitting home waiting for my sister so we can go to this party at my uncles. which now I'm told is NOT a Birthday party. But some sort of surprise...? I have no idea. I'm really excited and hope it gets me pepped up for the days ahead because I'm not feeling my usual Christmas excitement this year. It's my favorite holiday usually. I miss Christmas breakfast with my Mom and Dad, or opening gifts early. I miss getting excited over silly things. Sarah and I kind of kept it alive last year. But, this year is different. I guess I didn't try, because I feel like I just didn't care to. Which is really sad when I think about it. I wish I had a home to go back to for the holidays, and could spend the whole day with my family. I'm so jealous of everyone who does. Just another thing I took for granted. Kind of think I'll sleep through the day until it's time for dinner, when I get to see everyone I love.

Sorry for the depressing rant.

Why so glum?

It's 3am, and I'm still awake! boo.
Unemployment is a tad depressing. Only because I'm not very good at getting myself out of bed before noon if I don't have a reason to :/ So, I stay up wayyyy too late and don't always have buddies to talk to.

I'm hoping I'll follow thorough with a few of the projects I have lined up after the Christmas hoopla this week.
1) working on a few more mini skirts. My first attempt was a mess, but #2 was at least wearable. Though it's pretty much done for now... It was a bit "delicate", I am not. :)
2)Living room makeover. Mainly I just want to get rid of like more than half of our storage (but, I have to do it behind Sarah's back, I'm fnding)
3)keep cooking! I've been trying.
4)GYM! before I have to cancel the membership :( due to being jobless.

I suppose these could qualify as New Years resolutions, as well.

The week ahead should be fun! I'm really excited for everything. Tomorrow night (well, tonight now!) I am going with the rest of the Brandt clan to see the OTHER BRANDT clan! (and, like Noah once said, The more Brandt's, the better.) It's very exciting, because sadly, I barely know them. It's my Father's brother whose married and apparently has 3 children (I thought there were 2). When I was young or possibly even before I was born they had a falling out and never spoke even though they lived right here the bay area all my life. I have met my uncle himself at least twice in the past 10 years. My mother had gotten in touch with him after my parents separated and I went to see him with her once, and he was at my mother's memorial service. MY father and his brother have reconciled in the recent years but he was living in Washington or something. Anyhow, his wife (my aunt?) invited us to his Surprise birthday party tomorrow night, and I'm super thrilled to see and meet these Brandt's. I Love family. I can't wait to have more!

I kinda secretly hope this week and the next go by fast. The first week of January is looking good so far. I get my hair done! I always put it off long enough to where it's a real treat when it's time. AND, California gets one of my favorite residents back.
All of January promises great things actually. More tattoo work possibly, and most importantly, a NEW Brandt.

Alright back to Three's Company! I wish I could find Christmas Vacation! I love Clarke Griswald.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Why not?

I guess the appropriate question is, why? (Because I know I'm not getting any of it.) And the answer is I'm bored, I like lists and shopping.
This is kind of my Ultimate wish list, I added some crazy stuff for fun!

I fell in love when I saw them worn by one of cocktail waitresses at Hustler. To die for.

Because they are over the KNEE! I am dying for over the knee boots...

Self Explanatory. (Also wanted: Top #5)
I LOVE this designer. Emily and I bought a few shirts from her this year and it was a total dream come true, since we've been drooling over this website for much too long.

#4: The Unattainable 2:

Chanel Camelia ring and Repetto purple satin flats (both older styles, as far as I know, not available at all anymore) Not that I could afford them if they were! A girl can dream...

#5: To go here!
Hellllloooooooooo, trampolines AND Dodgeball. Sign me up!

-Navigation for my car, or a phone with good navigation
-A trip to Tahoe or somewhere with snow to go Snowboarding.
-A place to live that I actually like, that isn't a but load of money.
-A Job

Monday, December 8, 2008

This is it, don't get scared now.

I think I'm slightly in denial that I will have no job in just few short hours. I really wanted to get to work this morning and have everything be back the way it was like a month and a half ago. I want everyone to be here plugging away or slacking off, whatever we did best. I guess I could actually do without a lot of those people, but I'd suck it up to get to work with the ones I did enjoy. Oh well, this is life. I an only hope that things will get better now.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Just because I'm losing, doesn't mean I'm lost.

Okay, so I am a little loopy, I guess. No one hates me. Or at least they don't anymore. I was just being overly sensitive, what else is new? We are down to less than 3 days left here and counting... It's really slow going (because there is almost NO work), so I've been getting off around 3ish the past few days.

I got myself back into the Gym! FINALLY. I have been putting it off for who knows why. I was soooo good last year about it, then I got my bike, and then Softball season came, and I figured I was fine since I was doing other alternative physical activity. WEllll, I can totally notice the affects of not doing shit since softball ended. Stupid Krust. Anyhow, I'm going to take my FAVORITE class tonight! Spinning with Dave Dude Bro! I'm so excited I might try to hug him. I miss having my gym buddies though. My social anxiety totally kicks in when I'm there alone. But, really thats something I HAVE to get over.

OH! So, I got this Job lead from my father... One of his buddies is the CEO of this company in Embarcadero Center, and my Dad had mentioned to him what was going on with my job, and the guy told my dad to have me get ahold of him, because he might be able to "find a spot for me". Very exciting. WEllllll, I had left him a voice mail on Tuesday and sent him an email with my resume. Well, he did respond this morning, but that he was busy and he will be in touch with me in the next few days and that he looks forward to chatting with me. So, I was nervous before about having to contact him... Well, now I think I might be more nervous. I really just like instant gratification. I have a serious fear of the unknown. But, still, I am very grateful. VERY.

Sarah and I talked and decided officially on not getting a tree this year. We are going to save the $40 or whatever this year. We really have nowhere to put it and hope to move very soon anyway. I'll hang some lights and put out some stuff. Maybe I'll find a little bush I can decorate.

I want Thanksgiving dinner again. Now.

*EDIT* Lisa is giving me her Nordstroms Dress form that I will be decorating as my Christmas tree! Soooooo fucking perfect.

Monday, December 1, 2008

I can't really help it if my tongue's all tied in knots.

I just listened to "Follow you Down" By the Gin Blossoms. and now I want to listen to more and I'm totally watching Empire Records tonight. Thank You Gin Blossoms for bringing me some nostalgia this afternoon.

Work blows. The work part isn't bad at all actually. But, I have this really strange feeling that people here hate me all of the sudden. Who knows. I honestly don't know what I could have done, but some people are just being short with me now and I hate that shit. If you have an issue with me, tell me. What if there's a misunderstanding? I don't do well with these situations. I just don't get people when the get upset and just expect that you know what's going on, or just blow you off regardless. I have a great deal of respect for the people that are left here with me. I can honestly say that I feel our managers made the proper decisions keeping this group here to finish everything out. And I can't think of what I would have said or done that would have upset any of them. I would just like to know, so I KNOW. that's all. I could very well just be losing my mind, and there's no issue. I just have a feeling. Hopefully it will blow over, or I'll just ignore it. Unfortunately, I only have 5 days left with this group... :(

hmmmm. What else? I had a very nice Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving weekend. Heck, the past week has been reallllly nice all together, really. I'm a happy girl minus my work worries. I went out only one night out of the entire four day weekend. But, it was a great night. I hate lines... But I ended up having a ton of fun. I really still love San Jose. But, I know I won't be moving back down there anytime soon.

I'm really hoping we can get into San Mateo early next year... cross your fingers for me. However, I really should wait to look into moving until after I find a job. Seeing, as my now most promising job lead is in downtown San Fransisco which would be quite a commute for me, (and I HATE commuting) as well as an all around lifestyle change I'm sure. But, we'll see. It could be really cool.

Hope everyone is as excited for Christmas time. It's my absolute favorite. I'm really trying to be excited, I'm not as much as I usually am though... but it's starting to seem like it might be a gloomy one. I'm just not ready for it. But, I want to try not to let that get me down. It's always a bittersweet time of year for me, so I like to try to keep it as happy as possible.

"I can't let it get me off
Or break up my train of thought
As far as I know, nothing's wrong
Until I hear it from you"